Six Signs the Abuse in Your Marriage is Escalating

One of the real dangers of staying in an abusive marriage is that abuse generally escalates. Boundaries are nudged, pushed, and eventually outright challenged so that you find yourself submitting to abuse that would once be unthinkable. Humans acclimate to a wide variety of situations, but in an abusive marriage, this adaptability comes eventually at a severe cost. The first time I truly realized I was in an abusive marriage was about nine years into the marriage. Before I used the word ‘abusive’, I generally used the word ‘controlling’. No one likes to face the fact that they are abused.

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(With God!) You Can Overcome Your History of Abuse

I can remember sitting in a women's group hearing the testimony of another woman thinking to myself, "How did she know my story?" As she described the abuse she endured, I became uncomfortable in my seat. Part of me wanted to run out of the meeting and the other part of me felt slightly relieved to know that I was not alone. I had buried the sexual abuse that I had been subjected to and acted as though it had never happened. I often told myself that if I didn't remember it, then it didn't happen. That thinking, unfortunately, did more damage than good both mentally and emotionally.

What Kind of Abuse is it? Five Traits of a Narcissist

While it is tempting to equate all kinds of abuse as pretty much the same, narcissistic abuse has a few characteristics outside the boundaries of emotional abuse. Obviously narcissistic abusers are emotionally abusive, but the goals of a narcissist are significantly different from those of a person who is emotionally abusive. Knowing the difference is helpful. Narcissistic abuse requires a different approach to recovery, though the healing path from any kind of abuse is difficult.

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Can Your Spouse’s Addiction Give You PTSD?

Everything was getting blurry. This wasn’t supposed to happen. My chest was heavy, it felt like someone was crushing my chest. It was the hand of the enemy pushing me down.

I remembered once I had read that if you put your arms up over your head it will help you breathe better. I put my arms as high as I could and went down to my knees. No, it wasn’t helping. I stood up, arms reaching high, maybe I was supposed to be standing? No, that didn’t work either. I sat down, it was getting worse.

Want to Know What My Most Important Boundaries Are? Here's One!

Have you ever broken a boundary- with yourself?

Tell me if this sounds like you,

“Okay... today, I’m going to be awesome! I’m going to wake up early, eat something healthier than cereal, do my hair real nice, exercise, be a successful human being and rock my life”.

And then morning comes. And your bed feels so nice. The covers are warm, you bring out an arm from your nestled cove and the air is cold! Zip! Retreat!

Five Things I Want to Share About Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

When I was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), I was relieved that there was a name for my nightmare. Though, not all who have been through trauma and know the effects of it feel this way. My husband, who also suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder, was not as pleased as I to receive his diagnosis. My proactive nature read my “label” and determined to do the work for resolution. My husband, however, said he was fine and had more of an, “I won’t think about it and therefore it won’t affect me” approach.

If I Were the Devil

“We know [for a fact] that we are of God, and the whole world [around us] lies in the power of the evil one [opposing God and His precepts].”

-1 John 5:19 (AMP)

“Gone are the days when it was safe for kids to ride their bikes outside unsupervised and come home when the street lights turn on…. things were different back then.”

Have you heard anyone say that recently? I’ve heard it way too many times. Yes, things were different. Before the technological era and the media frenzy that have taken over the world, things were simpler. I can totally see it. But evil is the same as it was when it first met with mankind in the Garden of Eden as it says in the book of Genesis. Is Satan “gaining ground” on us? No. I would say he takes two steps forward and three steps back. We just happen to live in a “two steps forward” era.

Family, Faith, Mental HealthLeahMarch 20, 2017Grey Ministrieschristians and substance abuse, what can i do to stop my kids from doing drugs, how can the church address drugs, what does the bible say about parenting?, how to be a good, how to be a christian parent, how to teach your kids about sex christianity, how to teach your kids about partying christianity Comments

My Loved One Has an Addiction, What Can I Do?

This is a question I hear often but has a very complicated answer. While the definition of addiction is the same across the board and the behaviours for each type of addiction come out, in the same manner, the actual addiction itself does need to be treated differently. So I’m going to say, it depends on what your loved one is addicted to.

I’m going to split this into the “big four” addictions. Some of these, I have up-close and personal experience with while others I do not, so if you’re the spouse of said addiction and you’re like, “Ummm, Leah, that’s whack advice!” I'm so sorry, that’s totally okay by me.

How to Faithfully Deal with Chronic Insecurity

Whack! Strikes of pain shot through my butt as we slammed into yet another pothole. I moaned softly, strained my neck against the window and lifted my eyes to the flaking roof of the van. When would we get there? Or rather, the more pertinent question: when was I going to get there? Emotionally, physically… spiritually. I sighed and turned my head to watch the billows of dust surface in our erratic wake.

Get the Fairytale Ending You Need to Succeed

Every young girl dreams her own fairytale. Though each story is different we do all want the same thing. It isn’t that we all dream of being saved by princes, that’s not the case at all. What we really dream of is being the confident heroine of our story, admired for our inner strength, beauty and wisdom. We want to love and be loved.

Marriage, Faith, Mental HealthLeahOctober 3, 2016Grey Ministries Comments

When the Happy Girl Gets an Anxiety Disorder

I never thought I would get anxiety.

Growing up, I was one of those bubbly, almost-always happy little girls who found delight in chasing lightning bugs and drinking fresh lemonade on the back deck. I had fear like any child, especially when faced with being apart from my parents overnight, but I tended to live my life cheerful and smiling.

Mental Health, Fear and AnxietyReeve CurrieAugust 8, 2016Grey Ministrieshow to live with a drug addicted spouse, what it's like to love an addict, What to do when you love an addict, what to do when someone you love has an addiction, my husband is an addict what do I do, married to an addict in recovery, Leah Grey, Healing and Recovery for Addicts and their Families, Anxiety about a spouse's addiction, married to a drug addict, Married to an Addict, being married to an addict Comments

Practical Ways to Pray for Peace When You Have Anxiety

For the month of August, we’re going to be talking about anxiety and how to combat it God’s way. I’ll be grouping anxiety disorders in with “non-disorder” anxiety for the purposes of this article, even though I realize they’re very different but because spiritually-speaking, the treatment is the same.

To prepare for the month ahead, I want to start by laying down a very basic understanding of anxiety.

Mental Health, FaithLeahJuly 31, 2016Grey MinistriesMarried to an Addict, Anxiety about a spouse's addiction, how to live with a drug addicted spouse, married to a drug addict, married to an addict in recovery, being married to an addict, my husband is an addict what do I do, Leah Grey, Healing and Recovery for Addicts and their Families, what to do when someone you love has an addiction, What to do when you love an addict, what it's like to love an addict Comments