There's no secret that living with an addicted loved one is HARD! There are a thousand complications and nuances that make these relationships different from those we experience with the healthy and free people we love.
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I fell into a marriage with addiction, by fall, I mean, fell head over heels. I didn't want to live a perfect life, and I loved the party. I have always found going to a bar to be more enjoyable than Bible study. When I was first introduced to drugs, I thought they were fantastic. Aside from the fact that my parents were going to kill me, for the first time in my life, I wasn't shrouded in insecurity. The alternative crowd, the everything-in-moderation mentality, the excitement of the rave- it made me feel like I could be myself; darkness and all.
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In my marriage, there have been many ups and downs. I'd love to say there have been more ups than downs but I feel like that may be a lie. But it's not like I have been feeling bad for all these years!
Do you know what I mean?
In addiction circles, they call this, “practicing detachment” which essentially means we aren’t allowing the decisions and actions of others to affect our mood, thoughts and feelings.
I teach a lesson on detachment in my eCourse on how to make good, Godly boundaries. The course, 'UnBound Me', is currently being updated and will be relaunched later in 2018 but today, I’d like to talk more in-depth about detachment.
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Dear wife of the sex addict,
Good morning, sweet lady. What’s good about it, though, right? Your whole world has been shaken, and you’re not even sure you can force yourself to put one foot in front of the other, much less agree that it’s a “good” morning. I know.
Betrayal takes everything.
Everything you once knew and everything you once treasured is just... gone. All that was sure is no longer sure and you don’t understand. You feel lost... broken... lonely.
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